2005-01-03 - 11:01 a.m.

Well, it's been a while since I bothered to come here and confess my sins :)

BTW, hi Vanoonoo, thanks for the message but I can't reply as your diary is locked.

Where shall I start? I haven't been to slimming world in probably a month but fortunately I've got a really good group leader who is lovely and has been keeping in touch with me to ensure that I go back. I will be returning on Thursday and I am already scared and humiliated. In my month off I have eaten like a bastard. I have been away for Christmas and for some reason felt really good 'cause I drank loads of water!?! Yeah, that might be good to flush out my system, but what about the tonnes of chocolates and cakes I crammed into my stupid fat face?

I make myself so angry sometimes.

I weighed myself today and I was 16.10!!!!!!! The Slimming World scales weigh heavier than mine too which means that I'll be looking at perhaps 17 stone on Thursday unless I can start doing something positive now. I had done so well and then got stuck and screwed it all up. I really hate my inability to sort this aspect of my life out. It's ridiculous, I've go so many positive aspects to my personality and taking charge of this stupidity seems to elude me.

I took my exercise ball and a skipping rope away with me over Christmas. Did they see the light of day? Did they hell...

On a positive note (I don't want this to be all doom and gloom). I got 'You Are What You Eat' by Dr Gillian McKeith for Christmas and I've been reading through it. I have polycystic ovarian syndrome which made my weight go on initially and this problem causes a problem with insulin and the breakdown of sugars within the body (bloody hell, no wonder I put on so much weight. You wouldn't believe just how much chocolate I ate over that week long period). Anyway, the book is really informative and gives good advice about many things including how to help your body function properly and how to balance hormones, deal with cravings and generally give yourself the goodness it needs. Initially I have started to take:
Nettle Tea - Apparently this is a great weight-loss tea as it 'supports' metabolism (I guess that means helps it along) and is a diuretic. I can vouch for that last bit; I was piddling all day yesterday. It also contains vitamin B and boosts iron.
Spirulina - She has called this 'The Dieters Friend' as it is rich in protein adn helps to control blood sugar and cravings!!!! Just what I need - I got a tub of the powdered stuff and it is AWFUL looking. Spirulina is basically powdered algae and I mixed a desert spoonful into a glass of carot juice which automatically turned dark slimy green. To be honest I was frightened to drink the stuff (oh, and there was dark green powder all over my fingers, down the work surface and on the floor). I bit the bullet and drank it down quickly - there was no taste (apart from carrot juice) so I can safely say that no matter how horrible it looks, it's ok :)
Wild Blue/Green Algae - Supposed to be great if you want to lose weight and feel tired all the time. It is a complete source of virtually every nutrient the body needs. I picked this partly because it is also said to help you think better and gives good immunity against colds and viruses.
Yams (Sweet Potatoes) - I just picked up a few of these whilst shopping as they are said to be very detoxifying, balance hormones and bloody sugar and strengthens digestive function. Cool heh?
Aduki Beans - I'll just throw a handful of these into whatever I'm coooking probably as they are high in nutrients and low in calories. The bit that interested me was that she'd called it 'the weight-loss bean' and it is said to burn fat and balance metabolism.

Obviously I haven't covered everything written about these things, just the stuff that interested me. Buy the book, it's really enlightening.

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